Buy your stove last. First, figure out what you're going to eat: will it be boil-and-soak, or will you be doing actual cooking? That will determine what kind of cookware you'll need.

Once you've figured out the cookset, find a stove that works with it. Make sure the pot supports are wide enough to avoid a tippy pot, and sturdy enough to hold, without bending, the weight of the pot and whatever will be in it. Also check the flame pattern: if you're using a tall, narrow pot, a small "pinpoint" flame pattern will work well; if you're using a wide pot, you'll want a wider flame pattern to avoid concentrating all the heat in one spot.

I'm a long-time user of MSR stoves, including the Whisperlite, Pocket Rocket, Windpro, and Simmerlite. They're great stoves. However, I've recently fallen in love with my Jetboil Sol for solo use - it's like someone watched me cook and desinged a stove and pot just for me. (I boil-and-soak.)

Since you're doing real cooking, and I don't, I can't give you any advice on makes or models. I would advise you to stay away from the MSR Reactor; it's great for boiling water, but a bit limited on flame adjustment. There are some folks who can do real cooking on a Jetboil, I've heard; and Jetboil does sell a fry pan and a couple different pots that work with its pot support adapter. However, check out the flame adjustment before you buy - my distinctly uninformed opinion (since I only boil) is that it's not all that sensitive - but I could be wrong.

And, if you're like most of us, you'll have every good intention of buying only one stove to use forever. But, like the rest of us, you'll quickly realize that there's a proverbial highway paved with good intentions, and end up with three or more stoves.