i'd always heard that particular pine substance pronounced "fat lighter'd". some northern friends of mine say they don't ever find it in the woods but it's not difficult to locate down here if one is in an old pine forest.
as to learning how to build a fire, when the kids were small, i used to challenge them to build a one match fire in the back yard fire pit. if they could get a fire going, it won a buck. if not....i could invent some more chores.
they got pretty good at it after a while. knowing that most of the effort is getting the correct amount of tender, small sticks and medium sticks on hand will serve them well. maybe.
i also prefer the "foundation of wood" to build the fire on top of. that technique also works well in a wood burning stove - the type you heat your house with - as well as it does building a camp fire.
another fire starting tip, a bit heavy for the back packers but i yak/canoe camp a lot so weight isn't as much of an issue, is to take match light charcoal briquettes, line three of them up, wrap in several layers of newspaper, wrap with string and store several of those packs in a plastic bag. you can get a pretty good fire going quickly with the three briquettes. by the time the fire is going good enough to cook over, that chemical smell is long gone.
i tend to take one 3 briquette pack for every campfire i plan on starting. the chief coffee maker really appreciates that when she arises before dawn to start the perculator. i do have to provide the wood so i gather up a "morning fire" worth of lumber before dark.
it's worth it to have that first cup delivered when i finally roll my carcass out of the tent.