thanks for the responses guys! Andy you make a great point about the dayhikes and short trips to prepare - I should have mentioned that the preparations and planning I'm doing now are for next year. In the meantime, we're doing lots of smaller car-camping type trips to places like the lake eerie islands, and some canoeing in Allegheny and Adirondacks. The purpose being that we get conditioned, feel out what we need, and see what our limits are in terms of hiking ability. From this experience, we know that we can cover 3 - 4 miles in an hour, unloaded, without issues. Andy your tip about converting the dry quarts to cu in is perfect - for car and canoe camping I have a bunch of Rubbermade containers for organizing, so as we pare down the gear, I know what it will fit in.

I was thinking that for my wife's pack, if she does have to carry anything, even though she wouldn't have much weight, I'd get her an internal frame pack so that it would transfer the weight to her hips... would that be reasonable?

OregonMouse - thanks so much for the tip on the weight a kid can carry. At that weight, I may have to make him a quilt also to keep his weight down. The tarptents are nice, but I think right now I'm going to have to stick with the kelty - need something with real enclosure for when we bring the dog. i'll keep that tarptent link handy though for when we don't bring her.