Ringtail- I was so lucky that as a 16-year-old a 60+ year old took all of us wild 16-year-olds under his wing and mentored us. He was the old sage of mountaineering and had a way of teaching that did not even seem like teaching. He got us to think about safety without ever putting out our youthful exhuberence. He took us up Mt Rainier, into the Bugaboos of BC, Granite Peak (highest in Montana). It did not even matter to him that in a year or so we had exceeded his abilities. He was as proud of us as any grandfather could be. He saved us a lot of trial-and-error errors and gave us the confidence to do even more than we had thought possible. He had no kids of his own, and I think he thought of us all has his kids.

When I am leading a trip, I have a different view than most people on this forum. (to be fair, I mostly lead techinical climbing trips) I take a risk by taking people out. If thier gear or actions are inappropriate, I definitely "advise" them. In fact I go beyond advise. Nobody is taking a 70-pound pack that includes the kitchen sink on my trips, beceause our little group is a team with a goal, and if one person's actions slows us down to the point of jepordizing our goals or safety, then that person simply cannot join us. I lift packs at the trailhead. If one is too heavy I just say. "let's see if we can get this pack a little lighter". If I have required crampons and someone shows up without, then they just do not go with us. After all, I am the one responsible when all hell breaks loose and bad consequences happen. Being a leader is about making decisons and sometimes that makes you unpopular. If that is condenscending, so be it.