"Manning up" does not entail abandoning your love ones (abandoning being different than leaving behind). Abandoning family is the antithesis of manning up - and the "traditional" marriage vows.
While I agree with your views overall, that's far removed from the context in which I used that phrase, which was, if you know you're going to leave her so you can pursue your dream, then tell her now.
First 10 years the contract was I would freak if he was gone longer than overnight. Now... yawn - 3 weeks, whatever - I'm just not that clingy anymore. Does that mean our relationship is on the rocks, nope - just different.
Heather, that's a great point and it illustrates that maturity has a lot to do with how well we handle separation. My youngest daughters are still in the "freak" mode, they still imagine all sorts of going ons when their SOs are away. I've been dealing with it since they had their first crush on a boy. They're in their mid-20s now and really just now learning how to deal with it, and it's nice to see that growth.
I wouldn't surprise me a bit if, in a few years, Barefoot Friar's wife was asking him "So, how long do I have to wait now before you start that thru-hike?"
I'll choose her over the dream, because in every other way she is a perfect fit for me.
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I can foresee a time when I get to do this along side kids or spouse. I'm good with waiting that long.
Not that is matters a bit, but as a father to three daughters that's "man enough" for me and I don't think you'll have any regrets at all with those choices. Keep looking forward to that hike and you'll do it.
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