Jim- your viewpoint is a bit dated.
While I don't disagree with either of your comments or observations, I disagree that Jim's are dated.
My 26 year old daughter is struggling with this right now too, and a big part of the reason is she wants to be "Held". She's a strong, confident young woman who's a manager at a local retail store with three men working under her, but she wants a partner that will be there with her most of the time, not someone who's going to be chasing their dreams for months on end, year after year.
That isn't old fashion or an out of date attitude. That's still normal and isn't likely to ever change.
What's dated is the notion that it's an either/or proposition.
We are all fully capable of making decisions for ourselves - men or women. If we can accept the strain of having the SO gone for six months or come to some compromise on how to make it work - we can.
If we know for ourselves that it won't work, we have the option of telling the SO "that won't work for me, if you go you're probably not going to find me here when you get back" - and hey, that's a choice for the you to make, too.
Your daughter's struggle is not in any way a contradiction to that. There are people who can, and people who can't, and you draw your boundaries accordingly. It's a healthy thing.
I'm not going to make the call on behalf of the OP's wife - that's a conversation for them to have all to themselves. I don't know if their relationship can take it. That's not my business and not my call.
Previous Topic
Index
