Jim- your viewpoint is a bit dated. I think it is mainly a matter of how open you were about your intent when you marry. I happen to personally know a very successful world-class climber who's wife was the one who told him to quit is job and climb professionally. He did extensive Himilayan climbing being gone for months. They are still together, raised three children, and are very happy. I personally do not need my husband to take care of me. I did it fine alone for many years before we met. If he wanted to go off on a 3-month archery hunting marathon, something I do not wish to do, that would be fine with me. I think each couple has a unique view on what "togetherness" should be. My view certainly has changed over my lifetime. My husband and I are both very self-sufficient, both of us somewhat being loners and introverts. Honestly, we have both had failed relationships in the past because they were too clingy and required too much drama. I just do not think you can generalize.