If you do any day-hiking away from the tent, you each should carry one of those 2-3 oz. emergency blankets (light weight silver mylar tubes). More important than equipment, is training. Perhaps your wife is "overly cautious" because she has not had sufficient survival training. When she feels confident of her abilities in the outdoors, she will feel less need to have so much "stuff" to compensate. Can she read a map, navigate, build a fire, know wilderness first aid? Do you give her a chance to lead on the trail, choose the route, set up the tent? I find that too often couples fall into role playing. Who cooks? Who leads? Who makes trail decisions? Who builds the fire? You both should be competent enough to solo, then you will be a competent couple.