Registered: 02/03/06
Posts: 6800
Loc: Gateway to Columbia Gorge
I've stayed out of this so far, but it appears that Barry's mind was already made up before he came here, so why are we confusing him with the facts? This whole thread has been a waste of our time.
Goodbye Barry, I hope you have fun with your fears, but you won't get very far in life rejecting out of hand all advice from people with many, many times your experience just because it conflicts with a book you read!
Even if, as seems probable, you're pulling our legs, you're still wasting our time. We could be helping people who are truly eager to learn, and there are plenty of them!
Edited by OregonMouse (08/21/0903:39 PM)
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May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view--E. Abbey
Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 20
Loc: southern california
Barry II:
You are 100% correct. Bears and snakes are very dangerous.
But you fail to mention mountain lions. They are very strong and very fast and they can sneak around quieter than any ninja. This is why we pack light. We need the agility to escape bears, snakes, and more importantly, mountain lions.
Mountain lions are everywhere in the woods (they have been spotted right outside NYC). Mountain lion are responsible for 90% of "missing hikers" They never find a trace because they eat everything. Sometimes they will find a torn shirt or a shoe because they can fall off while the mountain lion is consuming the carcass bones and all.
If you do risk your life and enter the woods, if you ever feel like something is watching you, that is a blood thirsty mountain lion. The only thing you can do is run screaming at the top of your lungs all the way back to town.
Oh also, you might get lost and fall off a cliff. That happens a lot. What you do in this situation is take out your lightweight tarp and use it like a parachute to land safely. Several people have escaped injury with this skill. With a heavy tent, you will fall to your death.
Also there are many poisonous insects out there and mice that carry the black plague. The only thing you do for that is hike in stilts.
There is a company right now with a "wilderness bubble" in the works. It allows you to hike safely throughout the wilderness without the possibility to contact ANYTHING on the outside.
There is a company right now with a "wilderness bubble" in the works. It allows you to hike safely throughout the wilderness without the possibility to contact ANYTHING on the outside.
And if that's too expensive, you can always stay at home and rent National Geographic specials!
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
You are 100% correct. Bears and snakes are very dangerous.
But you fail to mention mountain lions. They are very strong and very fast and they can sneak around quieter than any ninja. This is why we pack light. We need the agility to escape bears, snakes, and more importantly, mountain lions.
Mountain lions are everywhere in the woods (they have been spotted right outside NYC). Mountain lion are responsible for 90% of "missing hikers" They never find a trace because they eat everything. Sometimes they will find a torn shirt or a shoe because they can fall off while the mountain lion is consuming the carcass bones and all.
If you do risk your life and enter the woods, if you ever feel like something is watching you, that is a blood thirsty mountain lion. The only thing you can do is run screaming at the top of your lungs all the way back to town.
Oh also, you might get lost and fall off a cliff. That happens a lot. What you do in this situation is take out your lightweight tarp and use it like a parachute to land safely. Several people have escaped injury with this skill. With a heavy tent, you will fall to your death.
Also there are many poisonous insects out there and mice that carry the black plague. The only thing you do for that is hike in stilts.
There is a company right now with a "wilderness bubble" in the works. It allows you to hike safely throughout the wilderness without the possibility to contact ANYTHING on the outside.
Sparkyy you are forgetting the ants. Ever see the fourth Indiana Jones? Mountain lions are even scared of the ants. Chuck Norris almost died from an ant attack, but luckily he was able to roundhouse his way to safety. You HAVE to respect blood thirsty, meat eating, army fire ants that carry away small children all the time. Look at all the states that have large concentrations of these little buggers. Notice how many have Grizzlies. Grizzlies can't compete. They eat grizzlies for lunch. If you get a guide, make sure he knows the proper techniques for dealing with these monsters, and that he has the proper anti-venom.
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Registered: 09/18/08
Posts: 20
Loc: southern california
FinallyME: Thank you for pointing out the ants. Very dangerous. I heard about the Chuck Norris fiasco, he is lucky he has skilled feet.
What I do when I am in ant country, is I will eat lemons and/or limes 1-2 weeks prior to a long distance hike to acidify my urine. I then pee on my bandana and apply it to my skin as needed. IT is ultra-lightweight also! Oh, and OF COURSE I am wearing my stilts.
FinallyME: Thank you for pointing out the ants. Very dangerous. I heard about the Chuck Norris fiasco, he is lucky he has skilled feet.
What I do when I am in ant country, is I will eat lemons and/or limes 1-2 weeks prior to a long distance hike to acidify my urine. I then pee on my bandana and apply it to my skin as needed. IT is ultra-lightweight also! Oh, and OF COURSE I am wearing my stilts.
In the Sierras we have especially dangerous rock eating ants. It's always wise to pack your jumping stilts and use them while navigating scree and talus. Note the illustration at the top of the page - some of those are my hiking buddies, all satisfied customers!
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
Registered: 02/03/06
Posts: 6800
Loc: Gateway to Columbia Gorge
Let's not forget the dangerous flesh-eating slugs we have in Oregon. One of them could climb right up those stilts and munch off your foot before you know what's happening!
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May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view--E. Abbey
I've always said that nothing will get me back into the confines of a tent quicker than having something slither across my face as I take in the night sky from my bivy and tarp.
Let's not forget the dangerous flesh-eating slugs we have in Oregon. One of them could climb right up those stilts and munch off your foot before you know what's happening!
the California version isn't so voracious, but check this guy out - I had to lean out of the plane to get this shot, sorry it's a little blurry, I think the pilot was nervous it might rear up and knock us out of the sky. We were right about treeline.
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
It's always wise to pack your jumping stilts and use them while navigating scree and talus.
Lets not get too carried away here. Ultralite jumping stilts certainly have their place but recommending them to a new hiker is a recipe for disaster. Worms, cougars, bears, ants have all been mentioned, however, no one has warned of trees. Those stilts can cause you to be impaled on a branch. People have been launched into nests of carnivorous squirrels. People have even been lost in trees, never to be seen again. And we don't even want to talk about getting your head stuck in a hornets nest. So, start with light weight coffee can hiking stilts....then move on to the jumpers after you have some tail miles and experience.
I guess I forgot that not everyone was raised by acrobats. Thanks for the reminder.
For some, it might even be beneficial to start with something even lower than coffee can stilts. Platform shoes can be an effective training ground, followed by four inch high heel shoes. Navigating up and down stadium steps in four inch heels successfully might then be followed by espresso cans, and then by the taller coffee cans, perhaps stepping up to simple lengths of two by fours duct taped to the bottoms of your boots.
It may very well be that women are at an advantage with stilt hiking.... I wouldn't doubt there is research being conducted even as we speak!
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
You know, I once thought about trying the old urinate-around-your-campsite trick. Then I looked at the size of the perimeter. I couldn't drink enough water to ever make it around that circle.
I also thought of trying it once when I had a troop of Boy Scouts out - you know, more volume. Then I thought what would happen if anyone came by and got the wrong idea about what was going on with all those boys and two grown men - well, you get the idea. We decided not to involve Children's Services.
Registered: 02/07/07
Posts: 3917
Loc: Ozark Mountains in SW Missouri
I can't believe I did not get in on this one sooner...
Barry, the No.1 danger when hiking in the forest is hillbillies making you squeal like a pig.
(The rest of you really should have known to point this out to Barry)
No.2 is alien abduction.
After that it's Chupacarbras, then you get into your bears, panthers, wolves, ants and what nots.
If you instant message Jim Shaw he'll fill you in on best methods to deal with all of them, or you could pay him to guide you to places where you can learn how to use the lightest weight and most effective deterrents from a real master. Jim's expensive, but he's the best there is still living.
Jim learned from Rancid Crabtree himself, who was unarguably the top authority on the subject before his untimely death (or disappearance).
I highly recommend you do like the rest of us here and spend your money learning from Jim before you take your first hike.
I can't believe I did not get in on this one sooner...
Barry, the No.1 danger when hiking in the forest is hillbillies making you squeal like a pig.
(The rest of you really should have known to point this out to Barry)
No.2 is alien abduction.
After that it's Chupacarbras, then you get into your bears, panthers, wolves, ants and what nots.
Some of this can be mitigated by selecting location and season carefully... hillbillies do tend to migrate into casinos at particular times of the year. And aliens frequent higher altitudes, in the interest of wasting less fuel entering the atmosphere....
But you're absolutely right - Jim is the best solution to the problem. We could go post after post on the particulars, Jim could probably educate an attentive individual in a week or two.
I totally forgot about wolves - what was I thinking? Not to mention the marmots. Piles of clean bones have been found all over the mountains - it's the marmots and pikas! Probably the cause of the extinction of the grizzly bear in California, leading to the rise of gargantuan banana slugs to take the grizz's place as the top predator.
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
I'd almost forgotten about old Rancid! If they ever make a movie about Pat and his friends, there's only one logical choice to cast as Rancid: Randy Quaid!
My favorite story is "Poof! No Eyebrows!" and the sewer-pipe cannon.
I'm sure that if you read enough books, you too can give good advice, OM. Don't give up hope! We can only aspire to that doctoral degree in urban backpacking....
I went to a friend's house for a slumber party once and they talked me into a real live snipe hunt! (I'm not making this bit up, either.) They walked me out into the manzanita on a hill a couple miles from the house (my friend's family lived out in the foothills on a dirt road) and left me there with the sack as they wandered out making noises through the brush to drive them back my direction. Once I was sure they were out of sight, I walked back to the house cross country and was sitting on the couch watching tv when they got back - no one commented on it, and when I commented that I had made it back in time to dress out the snipe and put them in the freezer, no one bothered to look....
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"In the beginner's mind there are many possibilities. In the expert's mind there are few." Shunryu Suzuki
Man, I hate to push this thread over 100 replies, but.... What is a snipe hunt? Does not knowing mean I live a sheltered life up here?
It was a prank/trick played on new campers. The "story" and method is different as it is passed along. The basics are there is this "animal" called a snipe and we take the newbies out to hunt it. Usually it involves a sack to capture it. Some methods involve ditching the participant in the woods, others involve complex "fake" captures and torn bags to demonstrate the sharp claws and teeth.
Registered: 02/03/06
Posts: 6800
Loc: Gateway to Columbia Gorge
The version I most heard of was that the newbie would be left standing under a tree, alone in the dark, holding a bag, for hours, waiting for the snipe to fall into it. Of course, there are infinite variations!
There really is a game bird called a snipe, but "snipe hunts" do not involve the real bird!
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May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view--E. Abbey
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