This is a bit redundant but expands a bit on my first post.

Lots of people have taken their kids backpacking starting as early as a month (as you know, the kid is a lot more portable at that age)! Do read the article by Penny S on the home page of this site that I mentioned--and have your SO read it! Other posts in this section of the forum may help, too. A local Seattle area forum even has a long thread by parents taking their "littles" out: here's the URL. Lots of links to the parents' blogs there. Do some googling and you'll find lots of blogs from women who take their infants and toddlers out! I tried searching on "backpacking with toddlers" and found heaps of articles even after eliminating the ones obvioously related to budget travel.

Getting several moms and their littles together is a good idea! Or you may have to resort to car camping and day hiking if that keeps the SO happier, or when kid plus gear get too heavy. As I mentioned before, your having a means of emergency communication when out of cell phone range should help reassure the SO, especially with one of the models that let's you send reassuring messages.

As far as danger goes, I've always maintained that your risk is far greater while driving to and from the trailhead (especially coming home when you're tired) than on the hike!

I suspect that Wandering_Daisy may be out backpacking (perhaps with small grandkids), but you can read her older posts in this section of the forum,