Jim:

It's scary that we think so much alike. Very scary.

I also keep a second complete set of gear to loan to someone new to backpacking; they only have to bring their clothes and toothbrush. I do make them take everything out and pack it themself, while I explain what the different items are and how to pack a pack.

I usually give it to them at the start of the trip - at the trailhead, or maybe the night before as long as it goes straight into my car. Learned that the night I sent it home with a guy who just couldn't resist looking at it one more time and practicing how to pack it. Said it felt a bit lighter the next morning. Maybe that was because he'd set the tent poles aside and forgot to put them back in before he left.

I find it removes my worries to have control of that part of the trip (accountants barely missed taking the anal-retentive championship from engineers), and it also removes some of the newcomer's trepidations because they have a certain comfort level in knowing that I think they have everything they need. (Silly newcomers! )