Hey, you could carry a 2lb base weight with no food and still have lotsa stuff leftover to lift the twins and their packs and carry them the last few miles to the spot where they would reward you with smiles and hugs.
Listen to the trees in the wind
What if I told you I could lift over 20,000 lbs. Eat over 50 tons of dirt each day. All this is true and if you don't believe me, send me all your money and I'll prove it. Just call me the one. Yes the only one. No one can come close to what I think and know. I am all seeing, all knowing and generally the best at everything that can be done. The only problem I have is convincing my spouse. She thinks she knows more than me. But if you send me money, then I will be able to convince her. Well at least take her to the mall. Oh, by the way, when I hike. I don't need boots as I can float over the trail.
Your followers have met in the Everglades last Sunday in an evening rally. After hearing of your feats, new recruits joined the most fervent followers in our chant, " chaz . . . chaz . . . chaz. . . ."
As evening fell and we proceeded with the ritualistic lighting of the fires, we consumed handsfulls of dirt and attempted to lift the front end of a fellow disciple's Hummer in vain. Only our vaulted leader has the strength to do that.
We know as you've said that you're all seeing, all knowing. And as Johnny Rivers sang:
I'm the one, I'm the one The one they call the seventh son
I can tell your future, it will come to pass I can do things to you make your heart feel glad Look in the sky, predict the rain Tell when a woman's got another man
I'm the one, oh I'm the one I'm the one, I'm the one The one they call the seventh son
The prophets Willie Dixon, Rivers and Crash Craddock have predicted you'd come. We've gathered in the Everglades for you to lead us. We've joined together and passed the plate and have $123,842 as an offering to you, plus an airboat, two pit bulls and a disciple's sister. We await your blessing.
If you want us to send the money, say the word. I'll send $61,971 and one of the dogs and probably the sister -- we do have overhead and staff here. <img src="/forums/images/graemlins/smile.gif" alt="" />